Monday, August 3, 2009

Sarah is Six!

My youngest child, Sarah, turned six this week. I really can't believe she is six already! Her birth marked a huge step towards the Lord for me. I had already had three children before her and each hospital experience made me never want to go back to a hospital again. When I had Tracy, in 1993, it took me 2&1/2weeks to be released because of the infections I developed after an emergency C-section. When I had Jennifer, in 1997, they were bugging me day and night about my decision not to have her immunized against Hepatitis. When I had Robert, in 1999, the anesthesia for his C-section did not work like it was supposed to work. So needless to say, going back to a hospital was the last thing I wanted to do. I knew I wanted to raise more children, just not deliver them in a hospital. I thought the hospital was my only option.

Then in 2002 Michael, Tracy and I went on a ministry trip to Australia. There we stayed with a family that had had a homebirth. I had never heard of this in my life! Of course, after 3 C-sections this was not going to be a typical homebirth. I really felt that the Lord was testing my trust in Him again. In 1998, I quit my job at an IVF lab. That was a huge step for me. Deep down I knew I had to quit but it is easier said than done. I was still very fooled by the world and its ideas of what women should be doing. "Go to college, graduate, get a job, and then you can work AND be a mom(and maybe get married too)!" More money = more happiness. I finally let go of that security blanket. Now the idea of having a homebirth after 3 C-sections!

The first challenge: convincing a professional midwife to help me in this endeavor. I felt like the Lord opened this door for me. The first midwife I tried I had found online. She had mentioned she was a Christian and that is why I contacted her first. This was a huge blessing since many midwives out there are in to new age or some other non-Christian philosophy. When I first contacted her she said she was going to pray and fast about it. About a week later she came out to meet Michael and me. It was actually while we were getting ready for for the first ever Bunkfest(aka Ranchfest now). She had not yet agreed to take my case. We met then and talked. She had question after question for me. I gave her a copy of my medical records for her to look over. After that meeting, I think we talked on the phone 4-5 more times. She had obviously done her own research on homebirths after 3 C-sections. She finally called and told me that I had given her all the right answers to her questions. In other words, I think she was asking me so many questions waiting for me to give her a reason to backout. She agreed to take me as a patient! The Lord was providing a way.

She agreed to take my case in March. After that I was on the computer constantly researching homebirth. I found an online group that proved to be priceless. It was through Yahoo and it was called HBAC, Home Birth After C-section. I read and read and read some more. So many stories about homebirths after 1 or 2 C-sections but not many after 3 C-sections. It had been done though! I knew that if it had been done I could do it too with the Lord's help. I would soon be labeled a hopeful HBACx3. I read every single birth story I could get. The good ones and the bad ones, although the bad ones were a small fraction of all stories. The Lord was teaching me and showing me how to FULLY trust EVERYTHING to Him. If the worst happened, uterine rupture, I could die but I really was not afraid of dying. I was doing what I KNEW the Lord was wanting me to do.

I got a mixed reaction from my friends and family. I remember talking to my brother. His wife is a nurse so I am sure he got all the details of what could happen. I remember telling him during the conversation, "IF I die trying this know that I died fulfilling the Lord's will for my life." Of course these warnings were coming from a man that raced cars at high speeds around a track every Friday night, and he was good at it too. Still, everytime I watched him race I knew he could die anytime on that track but I would never try make him stop racing. I told him that I was fulfilling a calling and a hospital birth was out of the question. A few others called and talked to Michael including my uncle Bob. He is a doctor and had all the medical "facts" about homebirth too. My friends were a bit better. Many of them were in the fellowship that met at our house. They understood better why I had to do this. However, my homeschool friends were a little more mixed. They ranged from supportive to looks that you would give a crazy woman.

My pregnancy was fairly uneventful. I always gained alot of weight when I got pregnant. I think I gained about 55 pounds. I did have lots of swelling towards the end of the pregnancy but Sarah was due in August and it was hot! Some of my swelling went away when I finally propped up my feet and sat still for most of a day. I did have our ministry group praying for Sarah. She kept flipping into a breech position. My midwife had me sitting in funny positions to help position Sarah the right way. She flipped positions daily, if not hourly! Sarah was born 9 days early on August 2nd, 2003. She was a tiny baby, 5 and 1/2 pounds. Kelly, my midwife, had never delivered a baby that small! I do have a birth story written but will spare the details unless you really want them. Let me know and I will send her birth story to you.

What a huge step this was for me. Trust the Lord. Do you really TRUST Him with EVERYTHING? If you are struggling with this one important lesson, I learned He never fully takes away the fear but He is always there to comfort your fears and strengthen you for any challenges He may have put in your path. A little fear can be good for you. Just know that He is in control and whatever happens, it is all good! "The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?" Ps 27:1 What a blessing Sarah has been in my times of trouble since her birth. Many times when God had me in the valleys of life teaching me His ways, she was always there to bring a smile to my face.

Shabot Shalom,
Danielle

7 Comments:

At August 10, 2009 at 6:53 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your posts always inspire me to continue to trust in the Lord regardless of the outside voices. I many times find comfort in Isaiah 54:16,17 Behold, I have created the smith that bloweth the coals in the fire, and that bringeth forth an instrument for his work; and I have created the waster to destroy. No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgement thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and thier righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.
I pray that often for the elect of God so that we would stay focused on the work at hand

God Bless
Roz

 
At August 10, 2009 at 7:00 PM , Blogger Danielle said...

Roz,
Thanks for your comment. So kind! That is a great scripture! Yes, we do need to continually pray for our brothers and sisters in Christ.
God Bless you too, Danielle

 
At August 11, 2009 at 3:26 AM , Anonymous Shannon said...

Hi Danielle,

What a blessing it was for me to read this. I have struggled with fear since the birth of our youngest almost a year ago. It was a difficult birth for both of us - I will spare you the details - but it has had a profound effect on my faith and realization of God's sovereignty.

Even though it was a difficult birth with unexpected complications I am so thankful that we were at home with a skilled midwife and not in a hospital. Unfortunately she is not a Christian, but in talking with her afterward she admitted that "there are some things we just can't control" and she praised God for his mercy right along with us.

Thank you for posting this. I do believe I needed to read it. Sarah is beautiful. What an amazing miracle these little ones are.

~Shannon S.~

 
At August 11, 2009 at 2:12 PM , Blogger Danielle said...

Shannon,
It is a blessing that all turned out well for you. The Lord teaches us so much through the trials and tribulations of life as well as the blessings.

Reforming Daily,
Danielle

 
At August 15, 2009 at 3:07 PM , Blogger Ginny said...

Good story. I don't need the details, but it certainly glorifies the Lord. Thanks for sharing.

 
At August 30, 2009 at 5:55 AM , Blogger Stephanie said...

A little fear can be good for you. Just know that He is in control and whatever happens, it is all good!

Amen! There are very few amerikan "christians" that can understand that one...

We live off The Land, homebirth, have no health insurance, and no debt (not even a mortgage)...we just trust in The Lord and most people we know can't seem to fathom it, heard everything from we're lazy to we're crazy and backwards even (but if the world is forwards I want to be backwards!)....but if I bought everything from Wal-Mart, gave birth in the hospital with drugs, and became a slave for my material posessions then I would be applauded as "normal"....but NO Thank YOU!! They can keep it :-P

19 days ago my 19 month old son fell off his brother's bed and hurt his leg, BAD. He didn't seem to be in much pain, but he couldn't walk on it. We prayed, my husband and I, and sought out HIS guidance...Should we take him to see a doctor? HE said "It isn't necessary"....isn't that so cool!? ALL that STUFF that the "world" needs for security, just to have a rudimentary "peace of mind"...for the believer, it just isn't necessary! 3 days later my son was walking, with a slight limp...one week later he was running :-) Praise God!

Sad thing is I couldn't ask my family to pray, they would akin my not taking him to the doctor as Child Abuse!

Thank you for sharing this story, we need more examples like this...where people live an authentic christian life, completely abandoned to the mercies and providence of God despite all objections that arise in the natural world...but FAITH is the substance of things hoped for of things not seen...Health is in Heaven and we pray let in be on earth as it is in heaven and it manifests on earth according to our measure of Faith and HE is sure to save!! :-)

It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
Psalms 118:8

Put not your trust in princes, nor in the son of man, in whom there is no help.
Psalms 146:3

 
At September 2, 2009 at 7:30 AM , OpenID onbigturtlecreek said...

Danielle,

I would love to hear Sarah's birth story. I can put myself in the midwife's place as I remember praying before I was to deliver Oran at home. He looked to be a big baby and I was concerned with shoulder dystocia. God in his mercy got us all through it and blessed Rachael with a fine, healthy boy with only minor manageable complications. Thank you for sharing, and Happy Birthday little Sarah my friend!

Judy

 

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